This was me in November of 2006, I am second from the left next to my husband in the brown jacket, the other ppl are my in-laws
This is obviously my wedding picture with my sister in law. This would be December 2006.
And this is obviously me now. (And for the record, I am only 5'3") I was always skinny growing up. I never got the comments of "your so pretty" or anything like that, the thing people always noticed about me was that I was "so skinny." It almost became an obsession for me. I ran all the time, worked out, tried to eat healthy, then when I turned 16 I got a job at an Italian restaurant (oh boy!). Working didn't allow me to exercise and run like I always had and I began eating the food there. I would get out of school at 3:30 and drive 30 mins to my job, eat, then clock in. I started gaining a little weight and by that I mean I went from 105 pounds to 115 and I began to panic. I began not eating and then when I would eat I would overindulge and then force myself to vomit. I began to realize I had a problem and I started trying to make myself eat but I would get sick and vomit again. For me, it became an endless cycle that I felt was impossible to break. I finally forced myself to eat, little by little till I could eat a meal. I have never went back to that place and refuse to. My husband helped me a lot with that. He loved me the way I was and he loved that I was a beautiful person inside and out. It wasn't "your so skinny" I heard anymore it was "you're beautiful". I began gaining weight back and before we were married I believe I was around a size 5 which was big for me. I felt comfortable though. After we were married we moved to Montana and I was at home constantly b/c I couldn't drive in the snow which meant more eating. When I found out I was pregnant with my daughter I was about a 6/7 and weighed about 135 pounds or so. When I was pregnant I developed preeclampsia (with both pregnancies actually) and by the time I had my daughter I was almost 200 pounds. I have stretch marks from my legs to my breasts and everywhere in between (battle wonds of having children) After having my 2 kids, I am 145 pounds and wear a size 8. I struggle with my weight and body issues constantly. I feel like since I was always told growing up "your so skinny" and not "your so pretty" I had nothing about me that was attractive or noticeable. I have tried losing weight again and again but it always fails. I definitely do not want to be 100 pounds again but my goal weight is 130. That's 15 pounds, can I do it and do it the healthy way?! Its crazy how much your body changes after having babies! My husband has always been supportive and makes me feel beautiful but I would definitely like to lose a few pounds. I know this is kind of a long post and a little deeper than the usual but I feel like weight issues are something always on everyone's minds, especially women. I feel like there is a lot more pressure on women to look perfect and for moms out there seeing these celebrity moms rebound right back to a size 2 puts an enormous weight on your shoulders, or it did me anyways. Being overweight is something I am really struggling with at the moment and learning how to be comfortable at whatever weight I am. Confidence is key, but its something I have always lacked in. I want this to be a place you can feel comfortable and to feel beautiful and to know that everyone struggles whether its in the open or not. I will keep you guys updated on my weight loss battle but I know unless I am TRULY happy with myself it won't matter what weight or size I am.